We want the Velveteen Lounge to be a convivial place, a place where friends gather to discuss art, books, film and the like. It is in this spirit that we share an excerpt from a book off of our incredible paperback rack, 1969's The Single Girl's Book: Making It in the Big City, written by MARRIED woman Stanlee Miller Coy. Coy shares sage advice about life, love and work, of which all young women arriving in the big, bad city can take advantage (provided they're arriving in 1969). Here's an excerpt:
|HOW TO GET FIRED:
Do one or more of the following and you may be fired, or deserve to be: Snap chewing gum all day. Clutter your desk top with cute signs, plants, pencil holders, ashtrays, figurines, and stacks of papers and notebooks. Arrive late habitually. Put work away, cover typewriter, and crouch by the desk to race away the second the clock reaches quitting time. Take twice as long for lunch as rules allow. Talk to friends on the phone constantly. Spend eternities in the ladies' room, by the coffee machines, visiting pals in other offices. Take thirty minutes to settle down to work in the morning. Comb hair and put on fresh makeup at your desk. Look wrong: hairdo appropriate to a gala ball, dresses suitable for the beach, stockings with runs. Do the least amount of work possible. Complain constantly. Turn in sloppy work. Be moody. Show no enthusiasm. Take sick leave with predictable regularity. Mimic your boss behind his back. Talk about your boss's business. Criticize the company to friends. Be supercilious because you went to college and other female employees did not. Daydream--and show it. Be petulant about working overtime.
Do the least amount of work possible. Complain constantly. Turn in sloppy work. Be moody. Show no enthusiasm. Take sick leave with predictable regularity. Mimic your boss behind his back. Talk about your boss's business. Criticize the company to friends. Be supercilious because you went to college and other female employees did not. Daydream--and show it. Be petulant about working overtime.
Now, while I think there is much we can all learn from Coy (that becoming a sloppy drunk won't make you attractive to men, for example, or that you should spray secondhand furniture with bug killer or that a girl should keep a couple of gay friends on retainer, to use as escorts when she can't get a date), I feel she misses the mark in this section. I've tried most of the above tactics in my current job (particularly the moodiness and no enthusiasm parts) and, for the life of me, cannot seem to get myself fired. The young woman (or man) who relies on these suggestions might simply find herself known as the lovable, still employed, office crank. Coy's notions of what makes a truly terrible employee don't, unfortunately, translate into real-world job loss. However, I enjoyed the book and recommend it for booze-buying and decorating tips.
If you have an opinion about any book you'd like to share with Velveteen Lounge patrons, by all means click here to do so!